POULTRY:
When you acquire chicks and ducklings, retrieve the tiny human’s retired playpen from storage and set up inside to accommodate babies until they are old enough to safely relocate outside. Grab hubby’s weighted sein net from the garage and place over the play pen. No worries, hubby is long past committing you to the insane asylum at this point…lol! SAVINGS – another hutch. If playpen is already occupied, the garden tub will suffice.
Chickens and ducks get along beautifully together and can both eat same food / treats. If there should be any fowl play, the Rooster will keep everyone in line. SAVINGS – one stop shop at TSC
If you should discover you have more than one rooster when they are older, re-home all but one to your former farrier down the road. This will eliminate the unnecessary cock fighting. The one remaining rooster will protect the flocks. However, don’t be alarmed when the rooster becomes your youngest tiny human’s favorite and sneaks him into her bedroom. SAVINGS – cost of the childhood puppy or kitten
Start early with treats so that when it is time to move poultry outside, they will be accustomed to the sweet peas, corn, tomatoes, watermelon, etc. This is a tried and true testament of getting the birds to go into their safety enclosures at night. SAVINGS – energy chasing the birds with a net
Research how to maximize protection of feathered friends from predators. Not even Fort Knox will guarantee their safety from the likes of raccoons, possums, hawks, owls, minks, etc. Congratulations, you have mastered this accomplishment but now you will need to review the blue prints of your home to find a way to come and go without falling victim to your craftsmanship. SAVINGS – tears over the loss of a beloved Ark member
No worries about aerating your lawn…your feathered friends will go above and beyond tending to this task for you. SAVINGS – rental on aerator or aerating services
No worries on fertilizing your lawn. Not only is it potentially toxic to your Ark members, but the nitrogen in the bird’s waste will take care of that for you. SAVINGS – fertilizers
No worries in purchasing 30-40 bales of pine straw to freshen your beds annually. The chickens love to dig in pine straw and will ultimately scratch and sling your investment everywhere but where you intended for it to be. SAVINGS – $120 – $160
Nothing compares to finding that first duck or chicken egg…it’s like the first (framed) dollar you make in a business venture. SAVINGS – the Golden Egg
Be prepared to prepare every egg recipe ever invented, as you will have more chicken and duck eggs than you will know what to do with. You may resort to selling any extra eggs to support their fresh daily treats from the produce department. SAVINGS – trip to the dairy section
Ducks can handle Georgia winters fairly well, since they naturally have oily dermis but you will need to take extra measure to keep the chickens warm. Throw a head of cabbage in their enclosure. The energy they put forth pecking at and eating the cabbage will ensure their warmth. SAVINGS – heat lamp
The adage “there is one in every crowd” will hold true on the homestead. Be prepared to let your pet sitter know that they will need to pluck Aphrodite and Persephone (hens) from the trees after herding the other birds into the safety of their enclosures at dusk. SAVINGS – having to gather Ark for boarding
Benny may stay out if he prefers, as he is the gate keeper. Additionally, trust me when I say he will keep anyone or anything on the opposite side of the fence out of harm’s reach. NOTE: even the dogs are scared of Benny! Be sure to give your pet sitter the “code” for getting safely past Benny. Bring Benny in when expecting exterminator or landscaping crew. SAVINGS – alarm system
Although my choice of garden fencing keeps the feathered friends out most of the time, plant sage around the perimeter. Sage is one of the few herbs chickens do not like and can be plentiful for your witch spells. SAVINGS – harvesting own herbs
RABBITS:
Anyone that knows me well, knows that my bunnies are my Christ children. If I were told I could only have one pet, it would be a bunny rabbit without a doubt! If given the opportunity to have a bunny from a young age, you have the recipe for one of the most sociable pets to have around the house. On the contrary, some – but not all – of the rescue bunnies on the homestead have adapted to socializing skills to a certain degree but nothing like the bunnies that came to the homestead at weaning age…or arrived by birth.
Always have the does fixed. Not only can rabbits produce by simply looking at one another, females are susceptible to uterine cancer if not bred. See prior blog about mishap bunny litter to heed further advice. SAVINGS – time, sanity, vet bill for sexing babies and re-homing kits
Bucks are susceptible to testicle cancer when they are not altered… but not as common as uterine cancer for the does. SAVINGS – cost of neutering bucks
I recommend investing in one hutch per bunny but arrange hutches in a circle so that bunnies can see one another. I currently have hutches in climate controlled garage…simply because I grew weary of moving hutches indoors during hot, humid summers and back out to the shady side of the yard the remainder of the year. SAVINGS – none but saves peace of mind
NOTE: I would not recommend the smaller rabbit cages sold in pet stores. Bunnies need to have ample room to move around when they are not out exercising.
Although all of the does on my homestead are spayed, I do not recommend housing pairs in one one hutch for several reasons: (1) they need room to move around (2) I had one bunny bite off a chunk of another bunny’s ear (3) bunnies are the worst for grieving over the loss of a companion/hutch mate. SAVINGS – vet bill for injuries and worry about a grieving buuny
Bunnies tolerate cold weather better than they can tolerate temps above 70 degrees. When they were outdoors, I would equip hutches with misting fans and frozen bottles of water to help keep them cool in the summer. With passing time and global warming, I eventually left them inside once they were shifted inside for the hottest days. I honestly think they enjoyed being outdoors more but I worry about them less being indoors. SAVINGS – Time in refilling/freezing water bottles on daily basis…AND…peace of mind
Rotate bunnies to nearest bunny proof room(s) for daily exercise…most important…as I do not believe keeping any animal in captivity 24/7. If time is limited, you may pair up one bunny with dogs while you pair up another bunny with cats, as you interact with last of bunnies or another Ark species. SEVERAL NOTES HERE: (1) All of my animals interact very well together, so please do not try this at home unless proven successful, otherwise (2) Socialization with all animals is very important so do not resort to lazy alternatives more than necessary. SAVINGS – vet bill for GI Stasis due to inactivity.
Research safe feed (without seeds), hay (thimothy or orchard) and treats for bunnies. Keep bunnies groomed to prevent hairballs and consequent GI stasis. Keep nails clipped. If a bunny requires teeth trim, keep regular schedule with vet. As with all pet accommodations, keep living quarters clean and provide fresh water at all times. SAVINGS – use horse’s thimothy or orchard hay
FERRETS AND CHINCHILLAS:
Aside from regular exercise, social interaction, applicable food, water and safe treats, chin-chins will require the occasional dust bath. Observing your chin-chin taking a dust bath (made specifically for these exotics), is most entertaining. Again, best to invest in a hutch for these amusing creatures instead of the small cages commonly found in pet stores. SAVINGS – nothing – but worth their weight in amusement
DOMESTIC BIRDS:
The most important note here is that there are certain elements, oils, chemicals, fragrances, etc…that are toxic to birds. Please research carefully before lighting fragrant candles, burning sage or incense with bird cage inside, using fragrant room sprays, etc. SAVINGS: smell goods
RATS:
Expect to see a few rodents take up on the homestead. Wherever you have outside animals, you will have outside food…wherever you have outside food, you will have rodents. Do not put out rat poison due to risk of poisoning Ark members SAVINGS – cost of rat poison
MYRTLE AND HER FAMILY:
…wherever you have rats, you have rat snakes. Corn Snakes and Rat Snakes may be observed on the homestead. They are harmless and will help to keep the rat population to a minimum. Since you do not want to put out rat poison for the risk of contaminating other homestead residents, Myrtle and her family will come to the rescue. NOTE: Be sure to gather eggs each day so Myrtle will not be distracted by the easier meal. SAVINGS – vet bills due to rat diseases
IRRIGATION:
After 20 years of service, your irrigation pump decides to give out. Deciding that the battle between the deluge on the south end of the house vs the drought on the north end of the house, you forgo a replacement. Instead, you decide to manually water grass and gardens, as needed. SAVINGS – $500 (+)
WEEDS:
For every weed you pull, 10 more take it’s place. This is where your chickens will come in handy and take care of the pesky nuisances. SAVINGS – weed control
HEAT PUMP:
After 20 years of service, your heat pump dies. What does this mean? Well, in the winter you will be using Emergency Heat, which in itself is HUGELY more expensive. Since you are in your menopausal years, you decide to forgo a new heat pump since hot flashes have become the norm. When tiny humans complain that the emergency heat is not warm enough, give them several more blankets and the lecture about how mankind survived before modern conveniences came along. SAVINGS – $5,000 (+)
GRASS
As most of you know, I am very anal about my grass; thus, the reason I do not have any grazing animals on the homestead. While 3 recent hurricanes have taken it’s toll on the St Augustine grass, I opt to leave summer weeds (that chickens avoid). After all, anything green when viewing the yard is satisfactory for my OCD. On the other hand, count on poultry eating 10% of the winter rye seed when harvesting…plan purchase of seed accordingly. SAVINGS – weed control minus 10% rye seed.
GARDEN
Sow seed in the Fall and bring plants in for winterization. Choose perennials that will return after South Georgia’s winters as basic foundation and fill in with your favorite annual seeds. Come spring, you will have a showcase that will keep you admiring your frugality. Additionally, learn how to root and propagate cuttings. SAVINGS – replacing costly plants each year.
DEER
Reinstall deer deterrents first of Spring (invisible fishing line). You will need to have a sharp memory of placement and some form of fitness to step over the maze of mono filament. SAVINGS – cherished heirloom roses cultivated thru the years.
TVs
When tiny humans migrate to College and otherwise, disconnect internet and and 4 tvs that used to entertain them and neighborhood kids. Keep Living Room, Master Bed and Bath cable. Your unlimited phone data will keep up with what computer used to supply. SAVINGS – $200 (+).
SEPTIC
Septic tanks typically need to be pumped 2-3 years. Any more often would indicate that service provider is not flushing field lines. Once you find a service that follows procedure and protocol, enter their contact as your preferred provider. NOTES: (1) Do not do laundry or run dishwasher unnecessarily during heavy periods of rain. (2) The 10% wastage of rye seed can balance out by not sowing seed in area of field line entry. SAVINGS – 10% loss of rye seed.
VEHICLE
Preferred choice for homestead is a truck, which can tow a trailer and haul bulk feed and hay. Keep records of regular maintenance, as this means of transportation and homestead maintenance is vital for your livelihood… and that of your homestead. SAVINGS – being proactive instead of reactive.
CONGRATULATIONS!
You have just budgeted enough savings to support the newest 2,000 pound Ark member until the ship sinks!
SIGNS OF HOMESTEADER
When last Ark member comes aboard, you abort former luxuries (hair stylist/colorist, mani/pedis, ect…). You decide to embrace the gray hair taking over the once mahogany hair color. Additionally, you resort to using a toothpick or paperclip to dig dirt out from nails and toenails. SAVINGS – monthly hair salon visits and bi monthly visits to the nail salon – $300 minimum
While your friends are at the hair or nail salon, you make the 45 minute drive to TSC for weekly supplies
When your friends close down the bar at 2AM… and you went to bed 5 hours earlier
When you opted to keep the TV in your room but are too tired to watch it
When flies are frequent house guests
When your wish list includes power tools and farm equipment
You spend more money on feed than food
You prefer the NO DRAMA of homesteading over anything else
Poop scooping provides therapy
You celebrate rainy days by accomplishing tasks indoors, a rare occurrence.
If your homestead residents outlive your retirement, alternate option would be to hook your truck up to the horse trailer in the driveway, climb into the driver seat with your traveling bunny and bribe another broke member of your sisterhood to “flash” scenic backdrops as you pretend to be “glamping”. When you realize you will only be able to convince your broke friend to perform this task only once, a projector and screen would be a 2nd option. HINT: grab some adult beverage and turn up Stevie Nicks for extended effects.
Homestead Memoirs 