Plentitude

As I awaken one morning this past weekend and realized that I still had my house slippers on (ok…well flip flops if you really must know), I stare in amazement and utter to myself…”Wow, I must have been really tired last evening!” This realization did not come as any surprise, as we have been extremely busy at work and most of us have worn several different hats the last few months due to labor shortages. Additionally, my routine at the barn had taken a drastic turn recently due to unforeseen challenges and/or revisions to schedule.

I sigh as I throw the covers to the side and make a mental note to oil tin man’s armor so that I can make my way to see the Wizard…OR…wait, is it Sesame Street? I manage to stay on my own two feet as I walk past the obstacle course of prisoners waiting on the early morning gravy train. After the assembly required for making a pot of coffee, I precede to the laundry hall to retrieve some grunge wear that actually made it to the dryer before mildewing in the washer. I grab the yoga pants that have never been to a yoga class but have seen the likes of the barn and the grocery store. By the time the canines have been walked, there is enough fresh brewed coffee in the pot to grab a “to go” cup. I considered that exhaustion from living in survival mode would take me back to bed as soon as all of the AM chores were taken care of.

Driving home, I felt like a child going to Walt Disney without the waiting lines, thinking about the comforts of my bed. I could not recount the last time I succumbed to sleeping after the sun rose. Feeling the aches of my dents and cracks, I fumble to close the blinds to shut out the waking world and glide into my bed that called my name louder than a Broadway musical.

Once in the divine comforts of my bed, I slipped into the 3/4 stage of sleep before I was awakened by my phone. In that one moment of time, I marveled at how I could be dreaming about something so realistic. Then I became fully awake in a panic…wondering who would be calling me in the middle of the night…or so I thought it was the middle of the night. The reality that it was early morning became even more frightening.

I scrambled for my phone until my blurry vision cleared enough to see that my mother was calling. I chose to ignore the call and regained my fetal position. Then, the sudden thought of my mother sending over task forces to see why I did not answer the phone, disrupted my overwhelming desire for sleep.

I immediately returned her phone call…only for her to ask for a recipe of mine…ugh!

Deciding that I will never have any luck going back to sleep, I make my way to the kitchen for another cup of coffee. Elated that I had a clear path to the kitchen this time around, I return to my room to contemplate my “to do” list for the day:

1. Take inventory and re-stock on my banishing herbs

2. Don’t play cat & mouse with the general public while you are out…or you will surely get caught

3. Decide before going out that you are not going to play the game…you are going to change the game

4. Since Mercury is currently retro, try not to lower expectations of others…elevate forgiveness if they strike a chord.

5. Although you are a fully evolved adult, admit to yourself that you may require support systems in areas of adulting

6. Do not compete with the other hide and seekers, collaborate with them and call it a character building day

7. When you entertain playing Blues Clues with another customer who appears to be staring at the various herbs…do not ask them “what”?… ask them “why”? Tread lightly if you should decide to conclude with “a watching pot never boils”…they may not find the same humor in this remark as you do. After all, you are notorious for making your own problems worse.

8. When the attendant approaches to see if you need assistance, inquire if they sell weapons and arsenal.

9. When you receive a look of horror from the attendant, simply reply…”don’t worry, it only becomes murder if they find the missing bodies”.

10. When the attendant responds…”we only invest in people, not tools”…LISTEN to them! You cannot truly listen and organize your hit list at the same time.

11. When the attendant’s counterpart enters from the stock room to ask if there is a problem, remove your desire to make any impression on them so that you can express yourself authentically. “Yes…I was wondering if you have this list of herbs in stock”?

12. Upon your departure from the store, you realize your vehicle was towed away when you parked in the handicap spot. Oil for tin man was on your shopping list and you could not walk the greater distance, until you were a well oiled machine again.

13. Call for a Taxi…you can unload all of your woes on them.

14. If the route home does not fulfill the time needed to cash out your emotions, have the driver drop you off at the local bar. Just remember the bartender is your spirit guide…so tip them well!

15. Finally, when you decide it may be best NOT to embark on this outlined journey, the phone rings again. This time, it is one of your tiny humans. Vow not to fill their head with your most recent daydream…instead, fill their heart. You answer the phone…”hello, my beautiful angel”!

16. Your suspicious caller precedes to ask what you are doing. You simply reply with “oh, nothing…just organizing my day”. Still suspicious, your caller says, “but mom, you always said that organization is only for people who are too lazy to look for or recount things”?

17. Response to this insightful tiny human: “plentitude is the positive energy we choose to take in, as it can be infinite. Amplitude can be compared to the output of negative energy, since it can be measured.”

18. Tiny human: “Ok, mom…whatever…gotta go…I will call you later!”

WELLNESS CHECK: Lol…I did eventually get some much needed rest…and I even had a lovely visit with the seven dwarfs!